Your Parent Needs More Help. Start Here.
This page walks you through six steps, in order. If something already happened, like a fall or a hospital stay, start with the crisis list below.
Your Parent Needs More Help. Start Here.
This page walks you through six steps, in order. If something already happened, like a fall or a hospital stay, start with the crisis list below.
Sources: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services; 2026 Medicaid Compliant Annuity Comprehensive Guide.
In a Crisis Right Now?
Do These 5 Things This Week.
Ask for the discharge planner. Every hospital has one. Ask what level of care your parent needs next and what the options are.
Find the power of attorney and health care directive. Without them, you may not be able to talk to doctors or manage bills.
Ask if Medicare covers rehab. Medicare can cover up to 100 days in a skilled nursing facility after a 3-day inpatient hospital stay. Days 21 to 100 have a daily copay. It does not pay for long-term custodial care.
Don't move or give away money yet. Medicaid looks back 5 years at gifts and transfers. Talk to an elder law attorney first.
Tell me what's going on. Fill out the form at the bottom of this page. Someone will contact you within 1 business day.
The 6 Steps to Plan Your Parent's Care
Work through these in order. Each step links to a full guide.
Talk with your parent
Ask what they want before a crisis decides for them. Keep the first talk short and pick one topic.
- Where do you want to live if you need daily help?
- Who should make money and medical decisions if you can't?
- Where do you keep your important papers?
Get the legal documents in place
Your parent must be able to understand and sign these. Once dementia advances, it may be too late, and the family may need a court guardianship.
- Financial power of attorney
- Health care power of attorney and directive
- Will or trust
Gather the paperwork
Put everything in one folder or binder. You'll need it for care applications, Medicaid, and emergencies.
- Doctors, medications, and insurance cards
- Bank, retirement, and investment statements
- Life insurance and long-term care policies
- Deeds, vehicle titles, and tax returns
- Military discharge papers (DD-214), if your parent served
Learn the care options
Care needs usually grow over time. Know what each level offers before you need it.
Plan how to pay
Medicare does not pay for long-term custodial care. Most families use one or more of these:
- Private pay from savings, income, or home equity
- Long-term care insurance
- VA benefits for veterans and surviving spouses
- Medicaid, which has income and asset limits and a 5-year look-back
Plan final arrangements
Write down your parent's wishes and decide how the funeral will be paid for. In many states, money in an irrevocable funeral trust does not count against Medicaid asset limits.
Read the funeral planning guideGet the Checklists for Every Step
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Questions Families Ask
When should we start planning?
Now, while your parent is healthy and can make decisions. Legal documents need your parent's signature, and most Medicaid planning works best 5 or more years before care is needed.
What if my parent won't talk about it?
Start small with one topic, like where the important papers are. Some families ask a doctor, pastor, or other neutral person to raise the subject.
Does Medicare pay for assisted living?
No. Medicare does not pay assisted living rent or long-term custodial care. It covers short-term skilled rehab after a qualifying hospital stay.
What if my parent already has dementia?
Talk to an elder law attorney soon. If your parent can still understand what they're signing, they may be able to sign documents. If not, the family may need a court guardianship.
What if my siblings disagree?
Put decisions in writing and share them with everyone. A family meeting with a neutral person, like a care manager or mediator, can help.
Is this help free?
The guides on this site and the How Can I Help form are free. The membership is $29 a month for checklists, lessons, and the monthly live Q&A.
Not Sure Which Step You're On?
Tell me what's going on. Someone will contact you within 1 business day.